For better or for worse
For richer or poorer
In sickness and in health
These words are familiar not just to married couples, but to everyone who have attended enough weddings and watched enough wedding videos. Most people recite the standard vows that include all of the above. For us, we wrote our own wedding vows, in which we also promised to love, in sickness and in health.
It's easy to write a beautiful piece of vow, really. Especially if you're a regular writer like me, you'd find no problem finding the perfect words to express how you feel. Which is why it took me so, so, so long to finally settle with my wedding vows, because I needed to make sure that they didn't only sound good alone, but each words meant exactly what I promised, and what I would and could fulfil.
Nothing hurts more than broken vows, especially broken wedding vows.
So after a good 7 months plus, it is the first time that my vow is being put to the test. Boon caught a sudden high fever on last Sunday morning, which was weird, because we were still having a ball of a time at Anna's wedding the night before.
Photos taken at the wedding. As you can see, he's still pretty much his jovial self, alive, kicking and mildly annoying. Just kidding :)
So yes, since Sunday morning until today, we've been under self-declared house arrest due to the consistent fever as well as the evil haze (just thinking about what our beloved neighbours say about it makes my blood boil. anyway...).
It's the first time that I'm taking care of him as a wife (previously when we were dating, it had always been his parents. my role was to visit and entertain him while at it), so I was pretty clueless on what to do. When I had fever in the past, my parents took care of me while I was at a blur, so I also don't really know what to do. Fail or not?
That Sunday morning, I sorta panicked a little cos his fever was mad hot, and had bad migrane and body ache at the same time. I went to the kitchen to look for panadols, and to my surprise, I found none. It meant that we haven't fallen sick for the past 7 months *yesh*. But, it also meant that we're such careless newlyweds that never stocked up on any medications in case of emergency. Please learn from our mistakes.
Drove out in the crazy haze, came home and fed him with some panadols which subsided the fever a little after a while. Went to the hospital for a blood test that night to verify if it was dengue, but it was too early to tell. It was then that my MIL asked if we made use of the thermometer that she gave us some time ago, that I recalled we DO have a thermometer at home! Max fail...
Say hi to the first batch of medicines that arrived at the Ng's.
You guys are the pioneers. Be proud of yourselves.
Throughout these 3 days, I wouldn't say it was difficult to take care of him, as it wasn't very much work to consistently fed him with 2 panadols every 6 hours. But it was more on the focus and attention given, unconditional love and patience showered, and other commitments declined that required a little bit of sacrifice.
I guess this is when I'm required to weigh which is more important to me.
Emerge, or my husband. Jobs, or my husband. Opportunities, or my husband.
Because I'm very, very sure that if I were the one sick instead, he would put aside everything to attend to my needs. He has proven himself enough for me to be so sure of it, and now it's time for me to live up to my vows. I won't deny that thinking about the money and opportunities flying me by hurts, but I wouldn't be able to focus if I worked anyway so I guess I just gotta keep telling myself that I won't win either way. Hahah. Well, it's a mental and emotional battle.
This is, of course, nothing compared to couples who go through way worse and critical sicknesses and situations together. Seriously, now that I have a tiny taste of what it feels like, hats off to all who braved through tough times together. It really isn't as easy as it sounds in the vows.
But this is a first, and it's a start of what fulfilling vows seem like. In the future, I would have to take care of the little ones as well, so I guess this is good training ground ;)
Would havta wait until tomorrow to know if this dengue, so help me say a prayer, and let's keep our fingers crossed.
Alrighty, this nurse has gotta go wake the patient up.
Til then!
love, Careen